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In the last newsletter I talked about uncertainty inhibiting decision-making. Today I want to talk about Wise Mind to facilitate decision-making.
Wise mind is a concept from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) where the emotional part of our mind (responsible for creativity, feelings of love, excitement, hurt, jealousy, etc.) intersects with the rational side of our brain (responsible for planning, scheduling, paying bills, attending to facts, etc.). |
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Being strictly in emotion mind or rational mind has a cost. Wise mind, though, is a space of grounded, intuitive knowing. Wise mind is not always easy to find.
For me, finding wise mind often means taking a couple slow, mindful breaths, then asking myself some of the following questions:
- “If I didn’t feel anxious or worried, what might I choose?
- “If I didn’t fear the outcome, what would I do?”
- “If no one knew I was doing this, would I still do it?” (this question gets at motivation--am I just trying to impress, or is this truly right for me deep down?)
- “If someone I admire were watching me right now, would I persist or pivot?” (this is not about impression management, but about being accountable for the behavior I choose)
- “If I’m being truly honest with myself here, what feels really right?”
- “Even if there’s a chance it will all go to hell, does this still feel like the right choice right now?”
When you are at a point of possibility with a decision to make (click here for the March edition that discusses POP’s and the 4 P’s), try connecting to your wise mind for help in deciding whether to persist or pivot.
Clinician’s Corner
If you are a clinician who wants to enhance your ACT practice, I have an on-demand course (6 CEs) called “Breakthrough ACT Techniques & Experiential Exercises: A Clinical Roadmap to Help Clients Overcome Psychological Distress.” Click here for more information or to access the course.
Are you an ACT clinician wanting to beef up your knowledge of RFT? I highly recommend this workshop (12 CEs) with amazing trainers, Miranda Morris and Evan Marks. Click here for more information or to register.
My feel-goodie of the month
My California kids are experiencing their first winter and seeing it through their eyes is giving me a renewed sense of awe and wonder. Here they are playing in their first snow. We’ll be sure to work on those snowman building skills ;) |
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Toxic Positivity with Whitney Goodman
Toxic positivity is a phenomenon that has become increasingly prevalent in recent years. It is characterized by the constant reinforcement of an overly optimistic attitude, to the point of ignoring, invalidating, or minimizing the hardships or feelings faced by individuals. This can create a sense of disconnect between people. It can also be detrimental to those struggling with mental health issues, as it invalidates their experiences and makes them feel like they are not allowed to have genuine emotions.
To address the concept and challenges of toxic positivity to individuals and relationships, we consulted Psychotherapist, Whitney Goodman. Walking us through her book aptly titled Toxic Positivity: Keeping It Real in a World Obsessed with Being Happy, Whitney helps us understand how to create an atmosphere of open communication, where people can be honest about their feelings without fear of judgment or invalidation. |
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Not Drinking Tonight with Amanda White
Alcohol is a pervasive part of many of our lives, but have you ever questioned your relationship with alcohol? Taking an honest look at the way we use alcohol can be a powerful tool in identifying our motivations behind drinking, allowing us to make more conscious decisions and better manage our consumption.
Therapist, Author, and Founder of Therapy for Women, Amanda E. White is determined to challenge the traditional “black-and-white” outlook on “alcoholism” by encouraging people to unlock a deeper understanding of their relationship with alcohol.
Exploring practices from Amanda’s books Not Drinking Tonight, A Guide to Creating A Sober Life and Not Drinking Tonight: The Workbook: A Clinician’s Guide to Helping Clients Examine Their Relationship with Alcohol, we examine how to identify the purpose alcohol serves in your life and how to use this knowledge to recognize patterns of unhealthy behavior, develop boundaries and create a healthier lifestyle. |
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The contents of this newsletter are for informational and educational purposes only. The newsletter is not intended to be a substitute for professional psychological advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you are struggling, seek the services of an appropriate mental health professional. |
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