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I went to a new yoga studio this morning and the teacher shared a reading about exuberance, which she defined as extreme joy and vigor; abounding in vitality. With my eyes closed, breathing slowly, I couldn’t help but break into a giant grin. I was immediately back on the lake.
If you follow me on social media, you probably already know where this is going. You see, I have tried to get up on water skis nearly every summer since I was a little girl. I have never, not once, ever come close to getting up. This summer I questioned whether I should try again. I wasn’t afraid of failing—I was used to that and knew I could handle it. I was afraid of injuring myself. I have a bad shoulder that I injured in high school and reinjured, badly, when I went snow skiing in 2019 after 25 years of staying off the slopes.
Some warned me away from trying to water ski, pointing out that if I hurt my shoulder again, I might be out of commission from yoga and pilates, two things I love and practice almost daily. It felt risky and to what end?
But in addition to my “what if I hurt myself?” thought, I also had a strong, “but what if…WHAT IF…THIS is the year I finally do it? WHAT IF I could say, after 40 years of trying unsuccessfully to get up on water skis, I finally did it at AGE FIFTY?!”
Our brains have a negativity bias. We are hardwired to overestimate threat and underestimate our ability to cope. This served a useful function for prehistoric humans, who had to outrun killer kangaroos, but it isn’t so necessary in our modern age. When we rely on language (predictions, assumptions, rationalizations, rules), like “what if X bad thing happens” we often end up playing it safe and shrinking our worlds.
What might happen if you turned your fear-based ‘what if’ into a possibility-based ‘what if?’
What if I don’t get hired…what if I do?
What if I bomb…what if I ABSOLUTELY KILL IT?
What if they reject me…what if they gosh dang adore me?
In my case, I finally got up on water skis, for the very first time, the year I turned freakin’ fifty! And it was one of the highlights of my life.
Talk about exuberance. |
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To Learn More
If you want to learn more about how to harness courage and boldly go in the directions you long to go, you might consider preordering my book, Imposter No More: Overcome Self-doubt and Imposterism to Cultivate a Successful Career.
NYT best-selling author, Eve Rodsky, said, “Imposter No More is a beautiful book. Stoddard is masterful at using her extensive training as a psychologist to address the why of impostor feelings while providing a blame-free practical guide to claim our power and confidence. This is a beautiful book.”
Clinician’s Corner |
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I’m thrilled to be presenting at an incredible conference this October called Innovations in Psychotherapy put on by PESI and Psychotherapy Networker. The conference has an exciting lineup of leading experts in mental health including Lori Gottlieb, David Kessler, Nedra Tawwab, Emily Nagoski, Dan Siegel, and more—and one of the keynote speakers is none other than Ashley Judd! My talk is titled “Imposter No More: Use Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to Help Clients (and yourself!) Overcome Imposter ‘Syndrome’” You can join this event live in Anaheim, CA, or virtually. To find out more and to register, click here and enter INV50 for $50 off your registration.
My feel-goodie of the month
I’d love to attach my waterskiing video, but alas, the file is a tad large (you can follow me on IG at jillastoddard if you want to see it--sound on to hear my family going absolutely berserk, which was probably the best part of all!).
So here are some other feel goodies from the past couple weeks. My husband, brother, and SIL on swings at an amusement park (so fun, and the water slides were even better!), the new wine fridge I bought myself as a belated 50th bday gift, and me recording the audiobook for Imposter No More at a cool studio in New London, New Hampshire. |
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ACT-Informed Exposure for Anxiety with Brian Pilecki and Brian Thompson
In the treatment of anxiety, panic disorder, and OCD, exposure therapy has long been recognized as the gold standard. But what if there was an even more powerful approach to confronting your fears or trauma?
For this episode, we welcome two esteemed guests, Dr. Brian Thompson and Dr. Brian Pilecki to uncover the transformative impact of blending traditional exposure therapy with the principles of ACT.
Through practical examples from their groundbreaking book, ACT-Informed Exposure for Anxiety, we learn about the significance of acceptance, values, and how clinicians can incorporate ACT concepts into exposure sessions, emphasizing the power of creativity and psychological flexibility in the therapeutic process. This is a must-listen for anyone seeking a deeper understanding of cutting-edge anxiety interventions. Tune in for an experience that could radically change your relationship with anxiety forever! |
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Hot & Bothered: Menopause with Jancee Dunn
It’s time to talk about menopause. Despite being such a pivotal stage in a woman’s development, it does not always receive the acknowledgment it deserves. And with half of the population affected by menopause, it’s about time we started talking about it loud and proud!
Helping us unpack the whirlwind of physical and emotional changes women experience as they go through this transition is Jancee Dunn, columnist, perimenopause warrior, and author of Hot and Bothered, who shares her insightful thoughts.
As we laugh and learn about the ups and downs of menopause, you’ll hear about the 30+ symptoms (yep, you read that right!), and we’ve got you covered with intimacy tips, the best treatments to ease the discomfort, and even some surprising positives about this stage of life. No matter your gender identity, we welcome everyone to join us for this refreshingly hilarious and eye-opening journey! |
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The contents of this newsletter are for informational and educational purposes only. The newsletter is not intended to be a substitute for professional psychological advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you are struggling, seek the services of an appropriate mental health professional. |
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